To the Right, To the Right

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)

escalator

When does common courtesy overlap with common practice? DOES IT? I have questions. There is a simple yet legal precedent to driving, whereas if you are moving more slowly you stay to the right and the left is for passing. We all know this, whether we practice it or not is another story. I have lived my life interpolating this rule of thumb to all other MOVING actions. On the sidewalk I stay to the right, on a walkalator in an airport, in a hallway, on a moving escalator. To me, it seems appropriate everywhere someone is either, in a hurry, just moving faster than other people by nature, or on fire… It just seems polite to let someone pass!

And this is where my rant begins. Nearly every day in Penn Station there is a “scene”. Yesterdays involved a non-descript man, saying “excuse me” in a non-descript tone to a woman standing on the escalator on the left. The onslaught that ensued was ridiculous. Her shouts of “if you wanted to walk you should have taken the stairs”, seemed a little excessive. I will admit I have been that person on more than one—or one thousand—occasions. That virtual conga line on the left of the escalator, with everyone trying to save a minute or a few seconds to catch a train is not a new phenomenon. But I just can’t get used to the angry “escalatee” who finds stepping to the right some sort of infringement on their civil liberties.

Where is courtesy, kindness, common sense? I think if an 18 wheeler was barreling up behind her while she was driving her car on the highway, she would get out of the way. Though in this case, there is an extreme possibility she would have had something to say about that as well.

I hear the arguments all the time. Those who say it is common practice, EVERYWHERE to simply step to the right and let people pass, and those who just complain that escalators are for standing still while it moves, and if you want to walk to use the stairs. As for the latter, that is all well and good with me…just stand your inconsidedrate butt on the RIGHT. Problem solved. 🙂

Contact: Red@dealingwithfools.com

Peanut Brains

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)
peanut butter

 

I have fond memories of childhood. Remember those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches—for me 1/2 a peanut butter sandwich and 1/2 a jelly sandwich—in the cafeteria? Remember the days when you didn’t need a note from the surgeon general to BRING something with peanuts into a school. Perhaps I am just getting old, but I have to say, in a graduating class of over 600, I honestly don’t recall anyone having the nut, dairy, egg allergies of today’s kids. One does NOT have to delve too deeply into the differences in lifestyle between yesterday’s devil-may-care, fly by the seat of your pants child rearing, and today’s everything we touch is potentially going to kill your kid standard.

Not having children, I can only speak as one who actually was a child (maybe still is). Fine, I get it. You only have your child’s best interests at heart, but a new study reported in the NY Times has me scratching my head in utter disbelief. The Times went so far as to call this study’s conclusion—that we should introduce “killer” nuts and dairy in the early months of your childs life— “a radical new treatment!” Radical? New?

Building immunities—exposing ones’ self to germs on a small scale is hardly a new concept in medicine. In fact, there was a study done in 2011 that showed children in day care, indeed, did get sick more often. However—and this is a biggie—by the time these same children got to grade school they were less likely to be sick. This research, done in Australia, says “Although children may become ill when first starting care, or when infections are spread in the care setting, there is no evidence that this leads to poorer health later on. Rather, it may be that exposure in infancy to a wider range of infectious diseases provides some protection against infections at school age.”

This leads me back to my “REALLY?” moment. The Time’s is heralding this study— introducing allergenic foods like peanut butter and eggs to babies as young as 4 to 6 months old from the study in the Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology: In Practice—as if it’s new and unheard of. But the reality is THIS IS A TRIED AND TRUE CONCEPT, PEOPLE! I will not divulge my age, but suffice it to say, I grew up loving music from the late 70’s and early 80’s. That being said, I don’t ever recall my mother fearing I’d go into anaphylactic shock when I came home from school and had a snack.

What have we done to an entire generation or two out of unfounded fears? I say this from a place of frustration. I’ve worked around doctors for…. Well….let’s just say a really long time. I read a lot of medical studies. I find it saddening and maddening that research is now showing that the number of young children affected by peanut allergies doubled between 1997 and 2002. Doubled! But you don’t need statistics to prove the obvious. HONESTLY…I find more than a very small handful of friends my age that have either the peanut thing or the dairy thing. There are exceptions to the theory that allergies are the new big thing. My brother has always been allergic to the lawn, but to this day I still believe that was so he didn’t have to mow it.

So really, is this new radical life changing information or just a concept that we’ve long known works on illnesses (why do you think the flu shot works?) being applied to allergies.

I’m going to go have some peanut butter right now. If this blog page goes silent, then you will know I was wrong. But I believe my own not too radical thinking will prevail. Exposure to all sorts of things can actually make us stronger. Just something to think about.

DDJ

The Fool in the Mirror

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)

Hand-holding-mirror-193x300

(Dedicated to my  Momentum Family)

I will own up to my own foolishness.  I was cynical, but deep down knew that there is a better outlook for me to have.  Going through life, believing I was not enough–that I didn’t matter, that someone is always better, prettier, smarter, more successful than me–was exhausting.  There is a better me underneath all of what I have carried around as absolutes in my head.

I did something so inexplicably unlike me, that even sharing it will likely have friends and acquaintances alike, fainting as they read on.   I went to Momentum Education Workshop.  I admit I was a smidge skeptical, thinking I was way too broken to be fixed. I was sure I was way too set in my ways to make changes in my belief system.  But, I did go in knowing I would give it my all since I indeed wanted a change that just going to the gym or traveling to beautiful, amazing places–even with the people I love the most–wasn’t enough.

Was this fool able to transform, you ask yourself?  I will explain it as best as I can.  Surrounded by a group of strangers-turned-friends in a time frame that would seem impossible (a couple of nights and 2 days) I learned so many lessons.  I will never be so quick to judge, I will honor people for who and what they are, because they matter and I matter and because we are all more than the sum of our past or our present.  Learning that I am enough and that being vulnerable is not a flaw but a tool in allowing love in and subsequently letting it out, and being able to share that is a gift…. Not just any gift, but a gift that is contagious.  Going through life with a scowl on my face has produced a mirrored life right back at me.  As I walked through Manhattan this morning, head held high, smile on my face, saying hello to the guys in the deli, I felt what Sylvia High drove home.  Possibilities are endless, limitless, and achievable and ultimately I can be extraordinary.

I met some of the MOST amazing people in this workshop and I wish I could spend more time locked in a room with them.  🙂   They gave me courage, strength and the ability to let go, get in touch with the me I forgot, buried and left for dead.  Standing in a room full of complete strangers sharing my personal world was something I thought impossible before last Thursday, and yet its effect on me has turned out to be life altering. I wish amazing things for each and every one of the people I met.  Their lives and stories touched me in an infinitely profound way.

I feel foolish that I was ever skeptical.  My life is not stuck.  By changing my choices, by changing my beliefs, the facts of my life change.  This will likely make no sense to those who have not participated in the experiential workshop.  These types of things can not be explained on paper or in words.  It truly is an experience.  By experiencing it with people you have nothing in common with, but have EVERYTHING in common with is what I found truly extraordinary.

Momentum Education Workshop, Bayshore and my Emu…. DDJ is forever grateful

– I WAS HERE – Beyonce

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i41qWJ6QjPI

Today, 3/6/13   I am experiencing changes in the people around me.  It is still amazing.  I can’t wait for Advanced! 

Dealingwithfools.com – Debbie Jaffie

Women on Poles

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)

2013_Daytona_500_logo

Well, now that I have your attention.  Today marks the 55th running of NASCAR’s Daytona 500.  This is a first with a Woman Pole sitter in Danica Patrick.  I suppose I am confused about the hoopla.  Women have been around poles for YEARS.  😉 

 But I digress.   This is about the foolishness of those who do not watch but claim not to like NASCAR for … wait for it … because it’s “just left turns”, “cars going in circles”.  2 things:  It’s NOT just about those left turns, and they are usually OVALS, dammit!

 The components involved in the making of a great driver include the owner, crew chief, pit crew and driver.  Any one of these components to have a glitch during the race, (sans owner), can end that race in a second.  It’s tactics, mechanics, accuracy, skill and a little luck.   

 And you can’t forget the importance of the little things: When to pit, tires, no tires, how many tires, fuel or no fuel, change to the chassis, how to reserve what fuel you have?   I am sure I have lost some of you by now.  So to simplify it, try going 190 mph for a mile or 2 for fun… easy enough?  Now do it with 42 other cars at a feathers distance from you. 

Yes, I am a BIG fan.  And that took some doing.  I was a most reluctant New Yorker, but had a great friend walk me through it.  And once I learned, understood, and saw the type of athletes these men, (and now women), are I was hooked. 

 This is a sport I not only love, but respect. I sense the respect for its fans is mutual. 

 Maybe you will think I am the fool.  But I know better.  Watch a race with someone who loves the sport.  I think it can be contagious.  Perhaps you will love it too.  And to those who do… ENJOY the 2013 season.  I know I will. 

It came with directions

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)

blinker

What do you call them?  Are they directionals, turn signals, those blinky lights that tell you when a 4000 pound automobile is about to make a move?  I call them TOO COMPLICATED for the average driver.  On a short drive this morning—with no blinking lights in sight—I was cut off, forced to slam on my brakes, and followed a car that may or may not have been turning in the next millennium.

It’s not a new invention. These handy pieces of safety have been in cars in the U.S., either standard or optional, since the early 40’s! So what, they are still too new for people to grasp? Is flicking the signal such a burden even when that tiny bit of wrist action is for your own and the safety of others?  And by the way, more importantly, here in the fabulous state of New York, it is THE LAW!

That’s right, a little something you can find on their website,(http://www.safeny.ny.gov), though should have learned, gee, I don’t know…. BEFORE YOU TOOK YOUR DRIVING TEST, is that the use of the aforementioned  directionals is in the drivers ed book, rule book and law book.

A small refresher course courtesy of NYS: The Vehicle & Traffic Law
requires you use turn signals continuously during not less than the
last 100 feet traveled by the vehicle before turning.
A driver may not slow down or stop in traffic without providing an
appropriate signal for the benefit of following drivers.  This is
usually done by the car’s brake lights.
Directional signals must be used to indicate an intention to turn,
change lanes or leave a parking space.
←     →
As someone who puts on her seat belt immediately upon getting in her car, puts on the headlights when using windshield wipers, (another law), and actually uses her turn signals, I feel compelled to call out everyone who doesn’t.  It’s one thing to be lazy, selfish and break the law.  It’s an entirely different thing when it makes the roads—and me—unsafe.  Now run along… be a dear… and spend a minute finding the turn signal in your car…. I can guarantee it’s in there.

NO DRINKING ON SUPERBOWL SUNDAY?

Posted on by Red (aka:DDJ)

alcohol

San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee would like to ban hard liquor for the Superbowl.

Oh the FOOLISHNESS

Really.

Answering the Mayor’s drastic call for sobriety, Tucker Carlson, on Fox News, answered. “It’s possible that your team can play in the super bowl AND you can have a drink without setting fire to anything.”  Mind blowing!

 I am not particularly sure how in today’s economy tying the hands of business owners on, of all days, Super Bowl Sunday, is the most prudent way to handle the nuts who feel setting fires and flipping cars is the appropriate response to your team Winning.  (Although I admire The Mayor’s presumption of such.)   I admit, as a Jets fan I do not have a lot of experience with this, winning. But I would like to believe that a predisposed ounce of sanity along with a fear of large uncontrolled fires and a bad back would provide some hiccups to a championship celebration run amok.  It helps that I am most certainly not a certifiable nut, hell bent on destruction of property.

 What happened to the days of popping a bottle of champagne, cheering loudly for your team as they parade around in their new, made-a-week-ago, championship caps, and celebrating with a pile of wings and chips? And why can’t I be trusted with a real drink?

 It sounds as if the mayor has some impractical, if not delusional, advisors.  Banning “hard liquor” is not going to stop your average football fan from consuming enough beer to both set fires and flip cars, if that is what they really want to do.  I imagine his fear of the same headline craziness we’ve been reading after so many championship games in so many cities for so many sports is at the root of his desire for a sober Superbowl.  Yes Mayor, we also remember “The San Francisco Giants Riot”. Still, I admit I really don’t get it.

 The San Francisco Giants World Series win debacle ended with 36 people arrested during post game “celebrations.” 23 of those were deemed felonies.   So, according to Lee, I shouldn’t be able to have a glass of Patron on the rocks because 36 people in his city – the second most densely populated, major city in the United States after New York City – went nuts?

At my last look, Mayor Ed Lee had the following suggestion. “I suggest that they serve something (other) than heavy alcohol during the times of celebration cause that inebriation sometimes doesn’t help with people who might go beyond the bounds of acceptability in their celebration.”

 (YES, he said “cause”)

He says his concern is for the small businesses that got HURT during the baseball celebration.  So, of course, the answer is to punish all businesses that serve alcohol – along with all responsible adults.

 This seems to be a common theme these days. Punish the majority because of a small minority of law-breakers.

 But you have to love the American Beverage Institute for putting their 2 cents in.  In a statement on Monday, they asked the city “to avoid demonizing a perfectly legal product.”  Good point. But it leads to the question of why would the Mayor want to “demonize” and punish only “hard liquor” drinkers? I consider myself a pretty tame Tequila drinker, but I have known my fair share of well…let’s just call them rambunctious beer drinkers.  I do find it interesting that NO one seems to think WINE drinkers watch football… (Just an afterthought.)

 Well, I am pretty darn sure the Mayor’s idea is a foolish, unenforceable concept.  And, who knows…. Maybe the Ravens will win.  Or, perhaps the biggest fight will just be between the Harbaugh brothers.

red@dealingwithfools.com